Let another praise you

 

“Let another praise you, and not your own mouth; a stranger, and not your own lips.” Proverbs 27:2

 

Our natural inclination is to be first, uppermost, best, happiest; and coupled with that is our desire that everyone know it. I preach a sermon, but is that enough? Or do I need to know what others think, in particular how good they think it was (because, of course, I assume it was good). 

 

I meet a famous person, but is that enough? Or am I unhappy until I drop the name, so that others can know, hear, see it? 

 

I accomplish something; I succeed at something; I’m good at something, but is that enough? Or do I feel unrewarded until others comment, like, share, favorite, retweet?

 

The Proverb doesn’t forbid accepting praise. It forbids self-praise. It is attempting to protect the one who has succeeded, and is admired or celebrated for it, from self-deception and, therefore, from self-destruction. No one who praises themselves, who boasts in themselves, is ever thought of as highly by others as they think of themselves.

 

For Christians, the stakes are higher. It is not possible to believe both that we deserve glory and that God deserves glory (John 5:44). One wins out over the other, and determines the direction and destination of our lives. Because praise is ultimately about which way you live: vertically or horizontally?

 

The more I seek, receive, and enjoy praise from myself and/or from others, the more engrained these patterns of selfishness become. I come to anticipate the pleasure of the reward of praise before it actually arrives, which makes disappointment all the more bitter and hard to believe. Anyone who posts to social media has no doubt experienced a surge of pleasure before they check their account.

 

It is a fearful, dangerous, and shameful thing to find more joy in the “arms” of an audience (crowd, congregation, followers, customers, etc.) than in the arms of my spouse and my children; and especially more than in the arms of Jesus, my Savior, in comparison to whom all other glories, honors, and praises wither and fade.

 

A German proverb says, “self-praise stinks, a friend’s praise limps, a stranger’s praise rings”.  And Solomon writes later in this Proverb, “The crucible is for silver, and the furnace is for gold, and a man is tested by his praise.” (27:21)  Praise is inescapable, but not its effect upon me and within me. Praise does something to me, even while it does something for me. But praise is no utilitarian pursuit; it is that which reveals what kind of man I really am, and as a Christian what kind of worshipper I truly am.